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Post by Gabbin on Dec 31, 2004 22:23:03 GMT -6
LMAO, I served carrots tonight. Har! And they were totally popular. But, funny stuff, Scrappy. I love egg slog.
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Post by Phalon on Jan 1, 2005 0:16:25 GMT -6
Ah yes, Gabbin, but I'm sure you served rum-balls also, and the carrot sticks were just to clear the palette for the good stuff.
The motto at the end, btw, is one of my favorites.
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Post by Scrappy Amazon on Jan 2, 2005 9:52:42 GMT -6
What's the point in dying with money or good looks or a good body......what a waste.....you are still dead and can't use any of it where ever it is you end up.
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Post by Scrappy Amazon on Nov 24, 2005 23:07:41 GMT -6
Ok folks. I thought it might be time for another round of; "Make it Up As You Go Along!"
I have a few floating around in my head but they need more work....and more eggnog. lol
Feel free anyone who wants to drop one off.
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Post by Siren on Nov 27, 2005 1:34:47 GMT -6
A local station plays this one by Bob Rivers every year, and it always cracks me up. A male chorus sings it, to the tune of "Walking In A Winter Wonderland". It's even funnier than the lyrics can show.
Walkin' 'Round In Women's Underwear
Lacy things -- the wife is missin', Didn't ask -- her permission, I'm wearin' her clothes, Her silk pantyhose, Walkin' 'round in women's underwear.
In the store -- there's a teddy, Little straps -- like spaghetti, It holds me so tight, Like handcuffs at night, Walkin' 'round in women's underwear.
In the office there's a guy named Melvin, He pretends that I am Murphy Brown.
He'll say, "Are you ready?" I'll say,"Whoa, Man!" "Let's wait until our wives are out of town!"
Later on, if you wanna, We can dress -- like Madonna, Put on some eyeshade, And join the parade, Walkin' 'round in women's underwear!
Lacy things... missin', Didn't ask... permission, Wearin' her clothes, Her silk pantyhose, Walkin' 'round in women's underwear.
Walkin' 'round in women's underwear, Walkin' 'round in women's underwear!
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Post by Phalon on Nov 27, 2005 1:42:40 GMT -6
I've never heard that one, Siren, but boll, I'll be humming it for the next couple of days, I'm sure.
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Post by Siren on Nov 28, 2005 10:57:20 GMT -6
One of the funniest songs of the holidays was originally (I think) from Robert Earl Keen, though the Dixie Chicks and Montgomery Gentry have recorded it, too. We'd like to think our Christmases are as perfect as an Andy Williams tv special. But Keen's description of a family Christmas is, unfortunately, all too realistic for some folks!
Merry Christmas From The Family
Mom got drunk and Dad got drunk at our Christmas party We were drinking champagne punch and homemade eggnog Little sister brought her new boyfriend He was a Mexican We didn't know what to think of him until he sang Feliz Navidad, Feliz Navidad
Brother Ken brought his kids with him The three from his first wife Lynn And the two identical twins from his second wife Mary Nell Of course he brought his new wife Kay Who talks all about AA Chain-smoking while the stereo plays Noel, Noel The First Noel
Carve the turkey Turn the ballgame on Mix margaritas when the eggnog's gone Send somebody to the Kwik Pak store We need some ice and an extension chord A can of bean dip and some Diet Rites A box of tampons, some Marlboro Lights Halleluja everybody say cheese Merry Christmas from the family
Fred and Rita drove from Harlingen I can't remember how I'm kin to them But when they tried to plug their motor home in They blew our Christmas lights Cousin David knew just what went wrong So we all waited out on our front lawn He threw a breaker and the lights came on And we sang Silent Night, Oh Silent Night, Oh Holy Night
Carve the turkey turn the ball game on Make Bloody Marys Cause we all want one! Send somebody to the Stop 'N Go We need some celery and a can of fake snow A bag of lemons and some Diet Sprites A box of diapers, some Salem Lights Halleluja, everybody say cheese Merry Christmas from the Family
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Post by Mini Mia on Dec 14, 2009 0:59:21 GMT -6
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Post by Phalon on Dec 9, 2011 9:41:30 GMT -6
BP singing in the snow at the bus-stop this morning...
"In the meadow we can build a snowman. And pretend that he is partly brown...."
"Uhm, BP? Partly brown?"
"Yeah, like when there's not enough snow and your snowman gets all muddy."
"Why would someone want to pretend their snowman is muddy?"
"Uhm....because it's spring that they want the snow to melt."
"It's Parson, Dear. Parson Brown."
"Why would someone want a rotteny brown parson?"
"Huh?"
"The parsons Dad puts in the soup are white."
"Parsnips."
"Pars-whats?"
Thank god the bus came.
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Post by stepper on Dec 9, 2011 17:35:16 GMT -6
BOLL! That's priceless.
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Post by quettalee on Dec 10, 2011 11:20:35 GMT -6
That was a great exchange, sis. Thanks for sharing!
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Post by quettalee on Dec 10, 2011 15:19:47 GMT -6
Ok, I know that this is not Christmas...unless you say it's a Christmas commercial because you're in the market for a new car as a gift to put a big red bow upon...but anyway, I just heard this on the TV while I'm sitting here working and had to share. Too funny.
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Post by Phalon on Dec 12, 2011 11:30:00 GMT -6
I was reminded of that commercial, Q, as that day progressed (I never quite knew the words to Rocket Man either).
I relayed BP's story to Hubs, because I thought it was kind of cute. He laughed. Then asked, "What's a parson?"
"A minister, pastor, reverend, or priest....well maybe not a priest, I dunno and I'm supposed to be Catholic, but obviously not a good Catholic or I'd know this stuff...but a parson is a clergyman. That's why he can marry them, see?"
"Huh?"
"In the meadow we can build a snowman, And pretend that he is Parson Brown. He'll say are you married, we'll say 'no man' 'But you can do the job when you're in town."
"Oh, that makes sense."
"Well, what did you think the lyrics were?"
"I never heard that song in my life."
We then went through 10 minute round of 'yes, you have'/'no I haven't' which ended in me insisting he had to have heard Winter Wonderland at least 100 million times, and he insisting he never heard it once.
I asked LX when she came home from school; surely someone in the family would get this right.
"What's the lyric that comes after this line in a song: In the meadow, we can build a snowman?"
"And pretend that he is Carson Brown."
"Who the heck is Carson Brown?! It's Parson, d@mnit, Parson Brown! Sing it with me!"
Together: "In the meadow we can build a snowman, And pretend that he is Parson Brown! He'll say are you married, we'll say 'no man' 'But you can do the job when you're in town."
"Ok. Who the heck is Parson! Brown?"
"The preacher. Parson means preacher."
"Oooooohhhhhhh! Well, now it all makes perfect sense." The dawn broke. Someone finally sees the light....for me, it's the light at the end of the tunnel. And then she continues....
"I always thought it was weird that someone would want to marry a snowman named Carson."
"Huh?"
"You know, a couple of girls build this snowman, name him Carson, he comes to life and asks if they're married. They say 'No, man, but you can do the job when you're in town." This she says in a flirtatious Mae West 'come up and see me sometime' voice, while striking a seductive pose.
And you people wonder why I'm the way I am.
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Post by Mini Mia on Dec 12, 2011 22:15:39 GMT -6
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Post by quettalee on Dec 13, 2011 1:28:23 GMT -6
I had to log back in just to laugh...
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Post by stepper on Dec 13, 2011 17:48:20 GMT -6
I wonder how Hubs managed to avoid Winter Wonder Land all these years.....
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Post by Phalon on Dec 14, 2011 5:19:45 GMT -6
I'm still positive he has, and still trying to convince him of it.
One more lyric screw-up from the song, this one by LX...
"To face unafraid, the friends that we made, Walking in a Winter Wonderland."
Wondering what kinds of friends she's hanging out with.
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