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Post by Phalon on Aug 19, 2005 23:40:25 GMT -6
I'll see if I can write anything that floats. The Poseidon Adventure: Shirley a Mclaim story.
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Post by Scrappy Amazon on Aug 19, 2005 23:54:52 GMT -6
Shouldn't that be Shirley McClam? Or is that what you were aiming for and I missed it? Guess this really is Missing P....lol
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Post by Phalon on Aug 21, 2005 5:08:58 GMT -6
You are right, of course, Scrappy; one of those typo negatives and it was suppose to be Shirley McClam. How Shirley Mclame of me that I missed it.
Neptuning up the mussel car's twin clam engine now for the trip down the information highway in search of Poseidon.
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Post by Scrappy Amazon on Aug 25, 2005 12:40:07 GMT -6
So has posiedon drowned somewhere?
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Post by Phalon on Aug 25, 2005 23:10:23 GMT -6
Finding the Poseidon Adventure to be somewhat boring; just no dirt on the guy; he is squeaky clean. Walks on water in comparison to the other deities. Nothing naughtyical; in a league of his own.
Was swallowed and spat up by Cronus - but what Olympian, aside from Zeus, wasn't? Didn't get along with Hera - but who did? Sired 105 children by nearly as many woman, but again, not at all unusual. "Oh god, oh god, oh god, oh god" - dang, how many times can ya hear that until it becomes commonplace.
Just nothing extraordinary.
I may have to dive deeper into the depths, and sea if there are any obscure stories I can properly slaughter.
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Post by Scrappy Amazon on Sept 2, 2005 11:24:02 GMT -6
Hey! Madam P! Think you could do a two minute drill on some Indian Gods?
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Post by Phalon on Sept 2, 2005 21:20:30 GMT -6
Hhhmmm....don't think so, Scrappy. The two-minute drill, I think, works well for the mything persons of ancient, defunct religions....variations upon variations of stories of gods that nobody worships anymore. Tongue in cheek writing, and I wouldn't want to do that with deities that are still worshiped.
And writing anything serious about religion is just not my piece of cake.
Now - if you wanted to discuss a couple, I'd be more than willing to read. Always interested in learning more; just don't want to write it in this case.
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Post by Scrappy Amazon on Sept 3, 2005 6:39:54 GMT -6
I got your point...wouldn't want to offend anyone. How about some Druid gods? Epona?
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Post by Gabbin on Sept 3, 2005 22:52:09 GMT -6
Epona (epic) stories are awfully long aren't they? A bit Clavell-ish.
Posion should have some cynanide floating around oceans.
Har! Gams, very funny. And may I push the envelope (ouch! My finger hurts) by saying that he probably like mermaids because they were all wet.....
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Post by Phalon on Sept 3, 2005 23:07:54 GMT -6
Yes, Poseidon likes mermaids, I'm sure; being more of a tail admirer, than a leg-man.
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Post by Phalon on Sept 6, 2005 8:49:41 GMT -6
Just horsing around and did a 30-second drill on Epona.
Epony, it seems, is the Celtic goddess saddled with the responsibity of watching over of horses, mules, and asses in tight jeans. Made her way into the hearts of the Roman calvary, ('Mare I have this dance?' 'No, and kindly remule your hand from my ass.'), and was the only Celtic deity to do so. Follows reason, though, following the herds of wild horses roman the countryside.
More on her later; she seems like an interesting one. Of course, I'm just stallion for time.
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Post by Scrappy Amazon on Sept 6, 2005 11:31:26 GMT -6
LMAO....see why I love this thread!
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Post by Phalon on Sept 6, 2005 23:51:03 GMT -6
Go ahead, Scrappy, laugh your ass off. I'm sure Epona, herder of asses, will round it up and bring it back.
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Post by Scrappy Amazon on Sept 7, 2005 6:48:38 GMT -6
*snort* I heard also that she was the goddess of fertility.
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Post by Phalon on Sept 7, 2005 16:18:34 GMT -6
Yes, she is. Her symbol is the cornucopia; the eager plenty and that is why she is a fertility goddess; no birth control back then.
Too corny, or can you copia with that bad pun?
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Post by Gabbin on Sept 11, 2005 21:26:40 GMT -6
You should write for Epony Magazine, Gams.
Ass for the Gods, they seem to Cornocopia with any old thing.
Sounds like an interesting deighty. Aren't those old Gods and Goddesses, though? What happened with the Christian God, not very flamboyant at all. Hasn't had much fun, either. Shoot, only one Son.
Sorry, has been a long time since I have written much. Give me some time.
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Post by Phalon on Sept 11, 2005 22:37:01 GMT -6
I keep meaning to finish up on this goddess of horse play. Gotta get back to the two minute drill: The Epony Express.
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Post by Gabbin on Sept 11, 2005 22:39:09 GMT -6
Who is the goddess of horseplay? Are the children centaurs of attention?
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Post by Scrappy Amazon on Sept 11, 2005 22:43:17 GMT -6
*snort* (maybe that should be *whinney*?)
I miss you guys horsing around here...too funny. As for the christian guy...had one son and didn't even have any fun getting him here...no two minutes roll over and snore...pfft.
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Post by Gabbin on Sept 12, 2005 20:59:08 GMT -6
Too true, the all male family. Didn't even need a female to have him.........
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Post by Phalon on Sept 22, 2005 22:49:40 GMT -6
Staying clear of this discussion - out of boxed wine and Xena Sister out of town, and shoot, what fun is that? In addition, Gabbin, everytime religion comes up in a conversation with you, all I can think about is that college essay you posted awhile back, and still makes me laugh so hard that I can't type. BOLL.
Are we done with Epona yet? Need to clear my computer of erroneous saved information, and she is taking up space. What a horse.
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Post by Scrappy Amazon on Sept 25, 2005 6:54:49 GMT -6
You guys do the egyptians?
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Post by Gabbin on Sept 25, 2005 21:44:41 GMT -6
Hi Scrappy, Gams.
I was thinking Ophelia. Ow! I Ophelia good.....I Ophelia your pain.
Let me get motivated to do some research on her. This may be complex, but, I am okay with an Ophelia Complex.
La la al.
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Post by Phalon on Sept 25, 2005 22:01:18 GMT -6
Ophelia? From Shakespeare's Hamlet?
Ok, go for it; I'll hamlet you hamdlelet. Now I'm stuck with singing in my head, "Ophelia, you're breaking my heart" to the tune of Simon and Garfunkel's "Cecelia".
Urgh.
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Post by Scrappy Amazon on Sept 25, 2005 22:42:59 GMT -6
OMGOMGOMG!!!!
Uncle Willy!
K this is me sitting nicely in my desk at the front of the class....I'm ready!
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Post by Gabbin on Oct 8, 2005 21:28:57 GMT -6
Ophelia, where fore art thou? Tis the question. Ophelia nothing, please give me a sign if you are in the room. I spent way too much time on this-me and my caffeine self-and actually had to re-login.
Ophelia is a popular gal but has no history online beyond Shakespeare. So, we know she liked her beer well shaken but what else? Why is she famoso?
Ophelia is a Geek name, meaning one-who-is-a-nice-helper-with-a-calculator-in-pocket. Not a long meaning at all. There are two sides to her name: one is helper and the other is serpent. I choose helper.
Other than that, nada mucho.
Shakespeare made her famous in Hamlet. She was his girlfriend. He was feigning insanity for someone else's benefit and she believed it and went cuckoo and drowned herself.
Now Ophelia is everywhere as the poster child of insane women, hysterical gals (like me). They used to pose women in insane asylums as Ophelites. I made that word up.
I feel ya is no Oaf, though, and now there are all kinds of Ophelia groups, a band, you name it.
But the only person who seems to know who Ophelia is, is Natalie Merchant. Here goes;
Ophelia was a bride of God A novice Carmelite, In sister cells, the cloister bells, tolled on her wedding night Ophelia was the rebel girl, A blue-stockinged suffragette Who remedied society between her cigarettes And Ophelia was the sweetheart to a nation overnight Curvaceous thighs, vivacious eyes Love was at first sight, Love was at first sight, love Ophelia was a demi-goddess In pre-war Babylon So statuesque, a silhouette In black, satin evening gowns Ophelia was the mistress to a Vegas gambling man Signora Ophelia Maraschina Mafia courtesan Ophelia was the circus queen, the female cannonball Projected through five flaming hoops To wild and shocked applause To wild and shocked applause Hey, he-he-he-he-hey, Ophelia was a tempest, cyclone, a god-damned hurricane Your common sense, your best defense lay wasted and in vain For Ophelia'd know your every woe and every pain you'd ever have She'd sympathize and dry your eyes Help you to forget And help you to forget And help you to forget Ophelia's mind went wandering You'd wonder where she'd gone To secret doors down corridors She'd wander them alone All alone
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Post by Gabbin on Oct 8, 2005 21:34:02 GMT -6
I think I will now let loose, limber up a bit.
Oh, tie a yellow ribbon round the Ophelia, if ya still love me...do be dee.
Ophelia, Oh see ya, Oh smell ya, Oh hear ya, Oh dear ya.
Guess I should make like a banana and Ophelia out.
Ouch.
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Post by Scrappy Amazon on Oct 9, 2005 0:02:07 GMT -6
Whew..that was a doozie!
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Post by Phalon on Oct 9, 2005 23:58:48 GMT -6
Ophelia pain. Ophelia up? Never hear that anymore....full service gas stations a thing of the past. Hamlet me hand it to you Gabs; a fine job. Nothing to add, but a goregous painting of Hour Lady of Pain, done by the same artist who did Siren's new avatar: John William Waterhouse. Love this one. www.allposters.com/-sp/_i153397_.htm
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Post by Phalon on Nov 8, 2005 23:25:24 GMT -6
Another tragic love story: Hero and Leander. Ya gotta leander it to those Greeks; always appealing to us suckers for a good sob story. I wonder if all the Greek myths end in tragedy? Seems so; someone always dying, getting turned into a beast of some sort, or thrown up into the sky for safe-keeping to become a constellation forever more.
Hhmm...let me leander through the Internet to see what tragedy befalls these two.
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