Paladin
Whooshite Apprentice
Posts: 104
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Post by Paladin on Sept 13, 2015 12:18:26 GMT -6
What kind of doctor fixes broken Web Sites?
A URLologist.
A polar bear goes into a bar and says "Can I have a gin and (several minutes later) tonic please?"
The bartender serves the polar bear and asks, "Sure, but why the large pause?"
"Don't know," replies the bear, "I've always had them."
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Post by stepper on Nov 27, 2015 15:03:57 GMT -6
A burglar in Paris nearly go away with stealing several paintings from the Louvre. However, after planning the crime, getting in and out past security, he was capture only two blocks away when his van ran out of gas. When asked how he could mastermind such a crime and then make such an obvious error, he replied “I had no Monet to buy Degas to make the Van Gogh.”
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Post by Spock on Nov 27, 2015 15:45:39 GMT -6
Milky Way as seen from Mars:
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Post by Mini Mia on Nov 27, 2015 22:31:39 GMT -6
Too funny.
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Post by stepper on Jul 21, 2016 21:45:16 GMT -6
This is what I was going to update... A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months
The batteries were given out free of charge.
A dentist and a manicurist married. They fought tooth and nail.
With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress.
A boiled egg is hard to beat. Police were summoned to a daycare center where a three-year-old was resisting a rest. (I used to be the same way, but not any more.)
Did you hear about the fellow whose entire left side was cut off? He's all right now.
A bicycle can't stand alone; it's just two tired.
The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine is now fully recovered.
He had a photographic memory which was never developed.
When she saw her first strands of grey hair she thought she'd dye. .
Acupuncture is a jab well done. That's the point of it.
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Post by Mini Mia on Jul 21, 2016 21:52:02 GMT -6
These are funny. I wonder who sits around thinking these things up?
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Post by Spock on Jul 22, 2016 8:09:50 GMT -6
These are funny. I wonder who sits around thinking these things up?Nobody. If you have the right (wrong?) kind of brain, they just happen.
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Post by Mini Mia on Jul 22, 2016 22:02:10 GMT -6
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Post by stepper on Jul 23, 2016 17:50:08 GMT -6
I wonder what kind of brain it takes to think they're funny. What ever it is, that's what I've got.
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