The House of Whoosher!: Bard's Babble 10-04

[TamiZ]

LOL... okay, the bike *has* to stay outside; Mrs. Peacock gets annoyed easily. Just imagine Mrs. Garrett without her valium. The leathers... well... they are soooo dramatic, so yes. Leathers, please. As for the gun... well, it's gear you can't live without. Although, I maybe have to don my bulletproof Supergirl costume if you happen to come through that door in a not so good mood... LOL

And I'm waiting patiently. You know I'll piddle around for a couple of days... edit and proof some more... piddle... edit... and so on. Wait too long, though, and I'll putting everyone to sleep with the epic Ode to Weird Houses and the Maniacs That Haunt Them. Hahaha...

Seriously, Scraps... write in your own time. Your character is your character. It won't sound as good if you force it, so in your own time ; ) Besides... I've patience. Just as you've had patience with me and my writing... LOL.

[Scrappy Amazon]

Wow...ok guys just finished catching up and I gotta say....I am no match for either of you. Phalon...I humbly bow before your greatness....been a long time but the moniker seems fitting at this point OGMOTP. And Tami? What can I say? I've been telling you for over a year now....you should do this for real.

Good job ladies....now...what the hell am I going to do next? Pfft drive Scrappy's bike into a tree I think...lol

[Joxcenia]

And TamiZ, if you ever do think of trying to go pro... I've got a great site to share with you... it's the coolest! Just ask and I'll PM the link to you with a little info. I'm keeping it on the downlow. And it isn't my writer's forum either... it's tons better.

[TamiZ]

Thank you, ladies I appreciate the vote of confidence. And when I get a single idea in my head that I can write something down about that doesn't involve something remotely copyrighted by someone else, I'll let you know... hehe. When that happens, I plan to torment Scraps there with every single edit re-write. Even if it's only a comma v. semi-colon issue

All I know is that I'm having fun with this. The House of Whoosher and my fellow house bards are reminding me that writing is supposed to be fun. Thank you.

[TamiZ]

you go, Guru... I loved those last two lines. Question, though (and I may have forgotten this from reading through so quick to catch up before I started posting)... but does Guru levitate? or was that just symbolic?

[guru]

He doesn't actually levitate, but he has been accused of being an airhead. (Is this art imitating life?)

[Scrappy Amazon]

Evening fellow bards. I have an all around question. Just a general poll.

1) Which do you think is your best post?

2) Which is your worst?

3) Which was the hardest for you to write?

4) Which was the most fun?

5) Which one is the most closely related to something going on in your life, in other words, which one did you take some peices of your actual life to play off of?

[TamiZ]

scrappyamazon said:

Evening fellow bards. I have an all around question. Just a general poll.

1) Which do you think is your best post?

ummm... to be honest... don't think I've posted it yet.

2) Which is your worst?

my first one, probably... or... maybe I haven't posted it yet... heh.

3) Which was the hardest for you to write?

the one sitting on my hard drive... the one that I keep pestering Phalon about... LOL... although, it was also the one that flowed the fastest outta me befuddled brain.

4) Which was the most fun?

Well, shoot, Scraps... I only have a few to choose from that are already posted... LOL... ummmm... again, the one sitting on my hard drive... it got you all excited and multitasking because my lazy butt needs a kick to do research.

5) Which one is the most closely related to something going on in your life, in other words, which one did you take some peices of your actual life to play off of?

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I think the whole character is drawn partially from me in that I'm always second-guessing decisions and I can be tough on myself if after obsessing over them, I think I did the wrong thing. Focusing so hard on the past will make one forget about the present and the future. Sometimes I just need to stop and sit down... enjoy the songbirds in the early morning.... not that I'm in a good mood if I'm awake that early in the morning, mind you, but it could happen.

[Phalon]

Here you go, Scrappy: my twenty-question essay test all neatly typed and double spaced.

Which is your worst?

Let’s start with the worst first, because they are unfortunately the most fresh in my mind. My last three or four posts – from the time Phalon reenters the house with Guru, until the post where she finally falls asleep. The words were forced - jumping all over the place from one thought to the next. None of it flowed properly; it was an effort to get it out. I hated them and it shows. Sloppy work; embarrassing to reread and I’ve yet to go back fix the many typos in each of them. Yick.

Which was the hardest for you to write?

See above. There were bits and pieces here and there in each of them that were fun though. I shamelessly amused myself while writing of Scrappy’s “mental condition”, playing around with words, befuddling Phalon as she tried in vain to get her meaning across to Dixie. Had fun with the Mrs. Peacock character as well. But most of the rest of it…Pfft.

Which was the most fun?

Most fun. Many of these, because that is what this is all about. I wouldn't be doing it if it weren't fun. Some of the ones that stick out in my mind though:

The first, I think, was one titled “The Spiral”. I got the song stuck in my head one day; couldn’t get rid of it, and thought I might as well put it to good use. A very easy post to write; all I had to do was stick a bit of Phalon’s thoughts between the stanza’s of the song. I like easy.

Another was the post following Guru’s Possession pieces. Again, I am amused too easily. Had a lot of fun trying to figure out how to present one image that appeared to be another. And the hand on the butt thing and disclaimer: LMAO at that…again shamelessly.

Oh…and the one in the dining room where Phalon leaps across the table at SWM. I stood staring at my dining room table for awhile, trying to figure out how a 5”2’ woman in a long robe would be able to fling herself at a person on the other side. Leaping over it in a single bound did not seem possible, (rolling eyes). Crawling under it? Too time consuming. So I started playing around with the chairs; pushing them this way and that; and though I didn’t actually try it, (my family was already giving me enough strange looks at this point), I came up with the climbing up the rungs of the chair back thing. And this was more possible then leaping over it in a single bound?

And of course, the posts written jointly with both Scrappy and Guru. Always fun to write with a friend.

Which one is the most closely related to something going on in your life, in other words, which one did you take some peices of your actual life to play off of?

None of Phalon’s life; her past or present experiences, have been drawn from my own life, (Mom and brother are patterned after my family, but they haven’t shown up in the house yet, though Mom may be calling me late for dinner here soon). A lot of her traits though, are mine: her physical appearance, her clumsiness – which at least she has the robe to blame, her lack of culinary skills, and the closeness she feels towards her family and friends. And the touch thing. No second sight here, but I do feel the need to touch everything I pass; some things more than others, and there are some things I just can’t leave my hands off.

Her emotions are mine – in other words, I try to imagine how I’d feel if I were her and was thrown in whatever situation in which she finds herself. I find it hard to write a character any other way, which is why I have such a difficult time when writing dialogue for someone else’s character; tending to put myself in that character’s shoes and write how I’d react. Becomes easier as the story progress though, and the characters become more three dimensional then they were in the beginning.

Which do you think is your best post?

And the best for last: the first. Think my first post was my best: short and simple; it took all of two minutes to write – nothing rambly about it. Total nonsense; it didn’t have to make sense - that was the point. Just the way I like it: quick, easy – over in about two minutes, but full of fun. Uhm…talking about my writing; just a little foreplay on words there, and that I like to be a long drawn-out process, lasting well into the night, followed by...well, yeah, I need to get on with this, don't I?

As for my most recent post: Sorry folks, I really tried to add some house of horror stuff in there; blood oozing from the walls; a hideous face in the mirror…oh wait; I did get that in. Thought perhaps the floor opening up, splitting to reveal a deep fiery crevice to the depths of hell in which a giant taloned claw-like hand emerges and hands Phalon a pair of odor eaters for her boots might be in order, having failed to give them to Mrs. Peacock to spit-shine. Ran outta space and time though; hearing the tap, tap, tap of Tami oh-so-patiently waiting for me to finish.

Maaaloryeeeeeeee. We’re coming for yaaaaa.

[Scrappy Amazon]

Thank you ladies for sharing. I always find it interesting to see what people think of their own writing. And you are right we are our own worst critic!

[guru]

Five simple questions, yet they posed a great deal of difficulty.

1) Which do you think is your best post?

The first question was the hardest to answer. For now I'm goin' with Reply #93 because of the extremes. It starts with action, then tries to lull the reader into the sense of calmness as Guru tries to calm Scrappy. Well, gee ... I guess he wasn't successful since there was a spot more action. Funny thing -- when you read the very last line, the words (divorced from context) have an eerie feeling of calm.

2) Which is your worst?

Without a doubt Reply#7. A hodgepodge of unrelated sentences ... no cohesion, no direction, no foreshadowing. It's the literary equivalent to throwing darts at a dartboard.

3) Which was the hardest for you to write?

Replies 150, 151 - the Possession posts. They took forever to weave together from about a dozen ragged threads. I'm still not satisfied with them.

4) Which was the most fun?

I like trying to tie together the start and end of a post. (Hey, it's the only literary trick I know!) Reply #94 is the farthest reach to attemp that end. First comes a brief sidebar that has nothing to do with anything in the story. We resume the narrative like nothing happened ... until the last line makes the connection.

5) Which one is the most closely related to something going on in your life, in other words, which one did you take some peices of your actual life to play off of?

Possession part 2. There are three lines of dialog from an actual conversation.

[Phalon]

You remember posts numbers? What a postmaster with a postcranial memory.

[Scrappy Amazon]

Very nice..referance numbers and everything! Thanks Guru.

[Scrappy Amazon]

So I had been asked to answer my own questions. When I replied that I was the one asking therefore I shouldn’t have to answer I was told that it was unfair...pfft. Oprah and Barbara Walters don’t have to answer their own questions why should I? But I suppose you’re right when you say that fame makes for certain allowances. Oh well...here goes.

1) Which do you think is your best post?

In terms of writing and flow. I think I had two really good ones. The scenes I wrote in which Scrappy witnessed her parent’s deaths and the rape scenes of Titania. Both conveyed exactly what I wanted. All the emotion and action were darn near perfect. Both had one of those moments were you knew exactly what you wanted and it came out just like that.

2) Which is your worst?

My first, and definitely my last two. My first because I was nervous and wasn’t sure if what I was doing was going to be up to par. My second to last because it was written in haste and hurt and anger with the intention of not coming back to the story or the board for that matter. And my last one because like I said, I had intended to not come back so trying to get back into the writing frame of mind. And then figuring out how to weave all the plans we had previously had into bailing myself back into the story has proven to be rough. My next one may not be all the great either. Still working up to it I think. LOL

3) Which was the hardest for you to write?

The rape scenes. It hit really close to home and dredged up some not so nice memories. All the fear and pain conveyed in that one scene, I could almost smell his stinky beer soaked breath. I recall thinking I wanted a shower after I was finished writing.

4) Which was the most fun?

All the ones where I got to write with Phalon. Too much fun. Love all the little jokes we throw at each other when we get together. And then watching what I get turned into when I call her a hag...lmao

5) Which one is the most closely related to something going on in your life, in other words, which one did you take some pieces of your actual life to play off of?

I often use Scrappy to work out things in my own life that I don’t feel I can safely put out in public. One thing in particular. Scrappy has been a useful and cathartic tool for me. Sometimes very intentional sometimes not. And I do believe that a person cannot write like we do without putting something of ourselves into the character. I can see personality traits from each person in every character. Which isn't such a bad thing. Lends depth and emotion I think

I just want to take this opportunity to say what a joy it has been to be a part of this. And because of it get to know all of you. Thank you. And happy writing.

[TamiZ]

There you go, Phalon : ) A nice little predicament for you to play with ... heh. Hope you brought your marshmallows.... I think I have some chocolate in a pocket here ... oh, wait... ate that yesterday. Will stop by the Demo'n Go and pick up some more ; )

[Phalon]

And thank you, Scrappy. A pleasurable experience for sure writing here, and getting to know you as well.

Tami, Tami, Tami...now I gotta think, don't I?

Phalon's inner demon is her stomach; it talks incessantly to her and gets quite demanding at times with its low, angry hellish sound.

I think she'll conquer it soon though; determined to actually eat a meal next time Ms. Peacock opens the dinning room for service.

Loved the post. Funny stuff in there amongst the horror. A great combination of humor and drama.

[Phalon]

And Phalon feels so very, very bad she had a hand, (and a boot, and various other body parts), in ruining Ms. Peacock's wonderfully prepared and joyfully served meals, that she's helping out in the kitchen; preparing the next meal.

[Phalon]

<thunder claps; lightening strikes...the lights flicker, then go out. A hideous cackle; low at first, then louder; shrill and bone chilling resounds from the depths of the kitchen.>

Double, double toil and trouble;
Fire burn, and cauldron bubble.

Fillet of sole
In the cauldron boil, (pronounced in that Southern way so it rhymes with sole)
Eye of guppy and lips of cod.
Fin of bass and gills of scrod,
For a fish stew of powerful trouble,
Like a hell-broth boil and bubble.

Mmmwwhahahahahahahahaha




Dinner is served.

[Scrappy Amazon]

LMAO......you are too good.

[TamiZ]

Thank you, Phalon : ) Love the pic, too. Though, I don't know about that Mrs. Peacock... she can be... I don't know... such a kitchen witch sometimes... and the Cook.... You've never known fear until you meet the Cook of Whoosher, with her whisk...

eggs tortured at the break of dawn,
broken wide open and dripping upon
that greased up steaming hot griddle,
(extra grease if we're doing Southern this morn).

Beware... Batty Crocker is just flighty about her ways in the kitchen. A vampire, she loves to sink her fangs into new recipes. Beware beware... if you hear the 'whooooosh'... the Whisks of Torture... just where do you think the house got its name??

So Take Care, Your Wordliness... if your wish is a witch kitchen battle in the Arena of Whoosh, stand up to the counter and don thy apron. But if its only the home fries you've a hankerin' for... get in line. ; )

[Scrappy Amazon]

*puff puff puff* (slides to a stop in the middle of the room)

I hear you all hollering for me to hurry back.....I'm working on it I swear! I'm writing as fast as I can. Trouble is the muse is dancing out of order...

[Phalon]

Perfect Joxie!

I was thinking something along the same lines....that Joxie was behind the walls in the dining room, and perhaps Guru, in his search, can trigger a hidden door to open to reveal her....stuffing her face?

Damn, give some to Phalon? A left-over pickel, perhaps.

I've one more post in the works almost ready to go.

[Joxcenia]

Cool... I'm glad it works for you. I figured you had another post coming soon, so I finally forced myself to finish this tonight. I had started on it the other day. I was going to name the groundskeeper "Mr. Green Jeans," but never worked it in.

[Scrappy Amazon]

Nicely done ladies. Scrappy will be showing again soon.

[Scrappy Amazon]

Ok...finally got the muse dancing in the right order....part two and three coming soon.

[Joxcenia]

Can't wait!

[Phalon]

<shakes head> Mophead; how many time have I told you to "Beware the dwarves"? Ok, ok...so it was a child. But she was short.

Great post; great imagery; very disturbing.

[Scrappy Amazon]

Thanks....I think I told you...borrowed some of that from a recent nightmare I had. Knew those darn things would come in handy at some point. LOL

[TamiZ]

*Poking head up out of laptop*

Great post, Scraps. I loved your imagery. Faboooo boooo boooooo

Huh... obviously, I am spending way too much time reading these days ... I'm losing it.

Still, though.... very faboo, Scraps. It was your turn to floor me, and you definitely succeeded.

[Scrappy Amazon]

Thank you ma'am. You gonna poke your head in more often?